When Diane, a psychologist, falls in love with Charles, a charming and brilliant psychiatrist, there is laughter and flowers―and also darkness. After moving through infertility treatments and the trials of the adoption process as a united front, the couple is ultimately successful in creating a family. As time goes on, however, Charles becomes increasingly critical and controlling, and Diane begins to feel barraged and battered. When she is diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer, Charles is initially there for her, but his attentiveness quickly vanishes and is replaced by withdrawal, anger, and unfathomable sadism. What Diane previously thought were just Charles’ controlling ways are replaced by clear pathologic narcissism and emotional abuse that turns venomous at the very hour of her greatest need.

A memoir and a psychological love story that is at times tender and at times horrifying, Lost in the Reflecting Pool is a chronicle of one woman’s struggle to survive within―and ultimately break free of―a relationship with a man incapable of caring about anyone beyond himself.

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Trailer for Lost in the Reflecting Pool

Praise for Lost in the Reflecting Pool

The emotional journey that is Lost in the Reflecting Pool is a story of love and of life, of courage and endurance, made all the more real and relevant by Dr. Pomerantz’s human frailty. She, like the wild flowers in the field, despite their seeming delicacy, somehow finds a way to endure and eventually thrive. Pomerantz rises from her long suffering not as an invulnerable superhero, undaunted and unmarred by all that has occurred, but as an ever more deeply feeling and thoughtful woman, mother and therapist―and, more beautiful for it.

Charles McCormack, MA, MSW, LCSW-C, author of Treating Borderline States in Marriage and Hatching Charlie: A Psychotherapist’s Tale

Lost in the Reflecting Pool is an intense, true story about how an intelligent woman is sucked into a marriage that slowly becomes abusive―not physically, but emotionally and mentally. A step at a time, she loses her sense of herself and her autonomy, until she begins to fight to reclaim her independence and self-worth. It’s important for women to read and understand how a marriage can begin with so much promise, and then become an almost fatal trap.

Marge Piercy, New York Times best-selling author, poet, and memoirist

Diane Pomerantz’s story of the longing for children and the reality of a punishing marriage may be an often-told tale, but Pomerantz’s is a majestic talent for conjuring emotion and compelling the reader with an authentic and heartbreaking story.

Jacquelyn Mitchard, NY Times best-selling author

Lost in the Reflecting Pool follows Diane Pomerantz through a harrowing psychological nightmare in which she is nearly lost to herself and her children. As it often happens, physical illness descends on her while she is in the midst of confounding marital upheaval. Is she losing her mind? Or is her spouse? As a mental health professional, Pomerantz has the expertise to look back clearly at what happened then, and the writerly chops to transform her story into a compelling, intense and emotional immersive read.

Judy L. Mandel, author of The New York Times Bestseller, Replacement Child